36. Unintended Collateral

36. Unintended Collateral

I ran into a gorgeous friend of mine today. He’s about a decade younger than I am and was like the fun uncle to my girls before After. Ed and his like-minded mate, Drew, were crowd favourites of Kate and Ruby’s. They were work colleagues of mine. Every afternoon after school, Kate and Grace would […]

35. More Revelations…

35. More Revelations…

It was nearly a year After, that Ruby rendered me speechless…again. We were having a shower- I almost feel guilty admitting that I had a shower with my 5 year old- something I never considered before After. While we were in there, she told me that she had a sore vagina. Ruby suffers incontinence now […]

34. …and another!

34. …and another!

I can’t remember the exact time or place I was when Mel called to tell me that her baby girl made a disclosure to her. All I remember is that I wasn’t shocked, surprised or stunned. It was with a sense of resignation that I accepted the reality, that this man was the monster that […]

33. I want to kill myself…

33. I want to kill myself…

As we hit the 12 month After mark, the process was really beginning to take its toll. We were still no closer to knowing a court date, the kids were still seeing counsellors, life was rolling on, but there didn’t seem to be a silver lining. The further we got from Jen, the more withdrawn […]

32. Hindsight can break your freaking heart!

32. Hindsight can break your freaking heart!

As determined as I am to focus on the future, rather than things I cannot change, there are a few moments in time that I reflect on and wish I’d been able to knit them together to form a whole pattern sooner than I did. When I started putting together all the various “parts” that […]

31. “What are we doing here?”

31. “What are we doing here?”

As mentioned already, it took us two and a half years to get “our day” in court. That’s a lot of time spent preparing, or what I believe, re-living the trauma, for this momentous occasion. Part of this time was spent getting the girls “familiar” with the courthouse and the people that would be involved […]

30. Navigating Triggers

30. Navigating Triggers

Humans are sensory beings and our memories are closely connected to these senses. I know that I love the smell of sunscreen, because it reminds of summers spent at the local pool. The sound of rain on a tin roof is a comfort to me. There is a certain light at night that at the […]

29. “Fake it till you make it”!

29. “Fake it till you make it”!

Being married to Brad is a blessing, but it has also been hard at times. All relationships are like that, and anyone that says anything different is delusional. Parenting young children, though one of the most rewarding times of your life, does add strain to a relationship. This was certainly the case for us. In […]

28. Insensitive…

28. Insensitive…

There are more good people in the world than bad. That is a fact. I don’t have any statistics to back this up…but if it were the other way around, we’d all know about it. Former US President Obama agrees with me. In his final speech at the White House as President he said: “I […]