34. …and another!

34. …and another!

I can’t remember the exact time or place I was when Mel called to tell me that her baby girl made a disclosure to her. All I remember is that I wasn’t shocked, surprised or stunned. It was with a sense of resignation that I accepted the reality, that this man was the monster that […]

33. I want to kill myself…

33. I want to kill myself…

As we hit the 12 month After mark, the process was really beginning to take its toll. We were still no closer to knowing a court date, the kids were still seeing counsellors, life was rolling on, but there didn’t seem to be a silver lining. The further we got from Jen, the more withdrawn […]

32. Hindsight can break your freaking heart!

32. Hindsight can break your freaking heart!

As determined as I am to focus on the future, rather than things I cannot change, there are a few moments in time that I reflect on and wish I’d been able to knit them together to form a whole pattern sooner than I did. When I started putting together all the various “parts” that […]

31. “What are we doing here?”

31. “What are we doing here?”

As mentioned already, it took us two and a half years to get “our day” in court. That’s a lot of time spent preparing, or what I believe, re-living the trauma, for this momentous occasion. Part of this time was spent getting the girls “familiar” with the courthouse and the people that would be involved […]

30. Navigating Triggers

30. Navigating Triggers

Humans are sensory beings and our memories are closely connected to these senses. I know that I love the smell of sunscreen, because it reminds of summers spent at the local pool. The sound of rain on a tin roof is a comfort to me. There is a certain light at night that at the […]

29. “Fake it till you make it”!

29. “Fake it till you make it”!

Being married to Brad is a blessing, but it has also been hard at times. All relationships are like that, and anyone that says anything different is delusional. Parenting young children, though one of the most rewarding times of your life, does add strain to a relationship. This was certainly the case for us. In […]

28. Insensitive…

28. Insensitive…

There are more good people in the world than bad. That is a fact. I don’t have any statistics to back this up…but if it were the other way around, we’d all know about it. Former US President Obama agrees with me. In his final speech at the White House as President he said: “I […]

27. But wait there’s more!

27. But wait there’s more!

‘”He did it to her too!” This is how the conversation began with Lucy about two weeks after I revealed what was happening to our family. As I mentioned in a previous post, Lucy sought advice about how to best approach her conversation with Teigan, her daughter. When she first bought up the subject with […]

26. Perspective…

26. Perspective…

The thing about experiencing a life-altering event like we did, is that life continues to go on. The other thing is that the age old adage that “there’s always someone worse off than you”, becomes very relevant. There are two things that I believe are worse than what our girls have endured. Firstly, having to […]